Hero’s Journey

Come on men, tell me this isn’t true: you avoid getting help because you’re ashamed of what you’re going through and you don’t want to tell anyone. You see it as some failure on your part. And God forbid you should have to attend a seminar and reveal your failings in front of others! Have you heard that old saying: A problem shared is a problem halved? (Those old sayings still work best, and this one is the best of the best.)

The fact is, when someone else shares their situation, you realise you’re not alone. You feel empathy, compassion – for the other person and for yourself. So by sharing you help others, but the benefit is even greater for you, the person sharing. You experience a tremendous relief because – even though it’s only for a moment, and with regards to that one thing –  you lift the ‘act’ that we all work so hard to uphold. Upholding the ‘act’ is an energy drain. Dropping it releases a tremendous surge of energy. The problem feels halved, and is, because we have more life energy to deal with it.

A hard fact of life is that if you want to be constantly motivated and energised, you have to make this a way of life. The sun doesn’t need motivation to shine, it just needs the clouds to be removed. The clouds in our lives are all the pretences that we uphold. So if you’re halfway down the chute, and not coping, then stop pretending. We’re all in the sh*t, it’s just a matter of how deep! Take a load off, and tell someone, today!

Mastery of self means being able to choose your reaction in any situation. Showing love, understanding, forgiveness, are the hardest to do, and therefore the best indicators of having gained mastery of self. You know you’ve really mastered yourself when you can do this with the people who push your buttons the most – your business partner, spouse, parents.

When, instead of arguing for the sake of gaining power and attention, you act to edify the other person, this is understanding. When you act with understanding without having to show that you’ve done that – purely for the other person’s sake and genuinely wanting no credit for it – this is love.

Once you have mastered yourself in this way, you’ll gain a glimpse into the world of the great actors, who can completely become any role they choose to play. In real life this is not false, it’s authentic, because it’s coming from a commitment, for example the commitment to be a loving person, and then acting from that, not acting based on what you feel, which is usually driven by the need to protect some ego concern.